mariposa

the first impressions gave me whiplash, but I’m grateful for it.

there’s a quiet girl in the passenger side of my car as we’re driving to the park

for our date, we’ll point across the lake’s horizon of objects with energies that remind us of each other 

afterwards, we’ll drive to the truck stop to share our music tastes and laugh about our unorganized playlists.

and, after we sit in silence for a while, you’ll spill every single pressure currently suffocating you.

throughout the next month, you’d update me on all of them; if they improved, we’d rejoice

but if they worsened, you still somehow possessed optimism in yourself  to alter them

I could never fathom how much you endured, yet let alone how you never let them detriment you.

you haven’t said a word to me since you said only “hi” a month ago. I didn’t mind.

not only because I understood your circumstances,

but because I was just in awe of how you’re still smiling.

I am so proud of you.

as I endure hardships I never told you about,

I’ll  learn to approach them with conviction,

the way you approached the much more detrimental antagonists you had

I’ll embody what I promised to embody, which are also the same ideals you also believed in,

to heal your soul, and to heal the world,

and to realize that our hardships are not a punishment or a statement of worth,

but instead a testimony of our endurance and to choose love to resist it

and, as time progresses, I’ll still have the same amount of praise for you.

I would say love (agape), but we never got to grow that close.

yet, for the small moment we spent together, I couldn’t fathom the chains you broke for me

I think I just want to say thank you.

for the first time, I don’t feel bitterness in abandonment 

but instead an honor, grace, and tranquility for what you provided me

as my memories will always remind the beauty you delivered into my life.

if we never speak again, I don’t see myself resisting, but instead I’ll smile too over the lake’s horizon

for I know that you’ll be liberated and finally find the peace you deserve.